"He doesn’t have any money at all. He spends all day counting jacks and nobody likes him. I remember when he was this tall and I saw him in my driveway, and I didn’t like him then either."
"Dolores, everyone already knows you've got the thyroid. Have you looked in the mirror lately? You are blue. Your skin is blue!"
"You're starting to get a little jam in your jelly, and you're never going to get a husband if you don't watch your figure."