Sunday, June 1, 2003

A Decade Fondly Remembered

Dear Friends,

   If you remember any of the following, you were probably alive during the 1980s"

1. The phrase, "That would be Smurfy!"
2. The first two years of George Bush Senior's presidency
3. Funny T-shirts

   That's all I can think of right now, and I'm second guessing whether the last one should count. Nevertheless, it should now be abundantly clear why I burden you with pointless, impersonal mass emails every month. Where else would get such charming regurgitations of pop culture nostalgia?
   For those of you who weren't alive during the 1980s, don't feel bad. There will be a special section next month of jokes that will only be funny to people who were dead by 1979.
   Anyway, the reason I bring all of this up is that "The Eighties" (as we used to call it) was when we, as a nation, finally learned how to dance. If you ever want to be completely repulsed, rent a movie that was filmed in the sixties or seventies, and fast forward to the dance sequence. It will make you wonder how the human race ever perpetuated itself. I did a little research on the web, and it turns out there may have been a rudimentary form of dancing even as early as the 1940s! Thankfully, there aren't any movies that go back that far, and no one filming a period piece about that era would be sadistic enough to subject us to this.
   How does this apply to Hard Taco? Well, the June song, "Pottymouth," is a quirky, danceable frolic that will make you want to really cut footloose like that maniac in "Flashdance." It's perfect for doing all the great moves from the Wiener Dog Strut and the Chubbo to the Funky Skidoo. Don't waste another second... Hurry over to K-mart because you can't download leg warmers from our site (yet!)

With warmest regards,

Our motto is and always will be: "There is no cure for Pac-man fever! But a couple of aspirin may help bring the fever down."