Saturday, March 1, 2014

Hard Taco Digest: CAPPSSS LOCKKKK!!!!!

Dear Friends,


That's the name of the Hard Taco song for March. It's a tale of science, jealousy, the scientific method, redemption, and testing a hypothesis.  As per usual, savvy click-makers who follow this link will be treated to a song and lyrics. As per unusual, I am also including stage directions, because you will want to act this out while singing it in the shower.

Once again:  Volcanoes!!

The first exclamation mark is there to give your weekend a little extra juice. The second is to facilitate the juicing up of your coming week, as well.

Notice that I call it an exclamation mark, not an exclamation point. Indeed, this august pillar of literary enthusiasm contains a point, but the same can be said for just about any punctuation symbol. Calling "!" an exclamation point is like referring to the Dalai Lama as "His Holiness the 14th Forearm." It only tells part of the story, and it's not even the best part.

The exclamation mark is a versatile but underutilized symbol. It can serve to indicate...

Surprise, excitement, fear or anger:

A musical:

Surprise, excitement, fear, anger, and a musical:
Mamma Mia!

The end of every e-mailed sentence:
Andrea! I heard you got a haircut! Yay! I hope you are surviving this weather! Let's have breakfast some time! Say hi to Ben for me!

Advertising prowess:
South Side Clinic: Medicine By Homeless People, For Homeless People!

Hell is throwing a cocktail party... and you're my plus one!

The beginning and end of any Spanish sentence.
¡Puedo comer vidrio y no me hace daño!

The factorial function:
6! = 720

A Eureka moment for a Mexican mathematician:
¡6! = 720!

That you are Edgar Allen Poe and you're in the middle of a sentence:
Beside the larder, oh! there was a dole-some rapping. 

That you are missundaztood:
That an alien is flipping you off with both hands:
_!_ (o_o) _!_

A confused scream (when used in combination with a question mark):
Our keynote speaker is just a forearm?! What happened to the rest of the Dalai Lama?!

You are fully juiced for the next seven days:

With warmest regards,