Fortress Party 2009 Retrospective

In addition to all of the individual room themes, Fortress Party 2009 had a miniature golf course that spanned all three levels of the house. 

They were selling putters at the Kiwanis club for $1 each, so I bought all of them. 

On the top floor, there was a working windmill. (It worked as a gold ball deflector, not as a clean energy generator.) If you successfully hit the ball up the ramp, it went into a PVC pipe that went down to the first floor, turned two corners and dropped your ball at the top of the stairway to the basement. 

As shown here...

In the basement, there was a second hole, where you had the choice up putting from here, or dropping your ball into the tube. If you did the latter, your ball would ricochet off a cymbal, and land about 10 feet from the hole. Both counted as one stroke. 

This hole was named after a quote from Starship Troopers, but I don't think anything else about the room pertained to that movie. 

Guests customized their golf balls, and they were everywhere. (The guests and the balls.) I say this every year, but I'm surprised no one got hurt. 

Cafe de Pamplona had Spanish decor and a bowl of Sangria that lasted an hour, at most.

We taped a white plastic tablecloth to the outside of the window, and projected a video of The Running of the Bulls, giving the impression that you were drinking at a wine bar, while all the action was taking place just outside. To pull this off, we had a PC and a projector sitting on a table in the back yard. It snowed that night, and the shadows of the snow could be seen on the image. 

Werewolf: To the Moon was, perhaps, the Fortress room that had the fewest of my fingerprints on it. Jason DePasquale and Amy Sumerton had come as guests in 2007, and had asked to design a room. Their team showed up with most of the meaningful content for this room a few hours before the party started. 

Since the full Moon triggers lycanthropy, this poor werewolf astronaut cannot return to human form until his mission ends and he returns to Earth. 

George W. Bush and John Kerry with both members of the Skull and Bones Society, a secret club at Yale. 

The society is rumored to own the skulls (and other body parts) of various historical figures.  The picture above is a demonstrative sample of the purloined body parts. 

I never seem to tire of lining the floor of Fortress rooms with fake snow. The Retired Quinn also had an igloo, a wheelchair, and a fire put to complete the look. 

This was one of the first times we tried to engage guests in a creative pursuit. There is an urban myth that Inuit people have 200 words for snow. So the retirees had to remember all of them and write them down. We ended up getting well over 100. 

We got our hands on a huge box of fake plants, and used them to make the Garden fo the Triple Goddess, which was sort of a woodsy Pagan thing?

This must be the Triple Goddess herself. 

Finally, we had The Hobo Jungle, where we had live music off and on all night. 

The Hobo King and Queen would sit on their thrones and play the harmonica.

Fortress walls and ceilings have always been hung on clotheslines, but in the Hobo Jungle, it felt appropriate to use them as actual clotheslines.

There was a garbage can on fire.

And during the party, plenty of hobo jams. 

With warmest regards,

Zach

Appendix: Fortress Party 2009 Invitation 

You are a very fortunate individual. You now have in your inbox a golden ticket to an evening of truly marvelous wonders and marvelously wondrous truths. Fortress Party is just one short month away, and we've searched the world over to bring you the freshest and most sophisticated fortress styles. We have applied both physical science AND applied science to fabricate what will be the most bewildering, intoxicating, and dehumanizing fortress in the storied 15-year history of the event.

 
FAQ:
Q: What is Fortress Party and has it really been going on for 15 years?
A: Let me field the second part of that question first. Yes, it has!
 
Q: Can I bring friends and relatives? 
A:  Please do. In fact, this year, we have made the decision to relax our policy against nerds. (Just kidding: no nerds please!) Children are also welcome if they can be trusted not to pull on things or start fires. Please let me know if you have any questions regarding our policies about children or arson.
 
With warmest regards,
- Zach
 
"Whatever you do this December, be sure you do some of it in one of Michigan's largest forts."